Everything's okay; only a week and a day until i'm FREE to have possibly the best summer, ever. i'm ridiculously excited :D

oh what you do to me, no one knows.

a few of my favourite films. yeah i'm aware the spacing is dodgy, but i'm too tired to fiddle around.

This is the beat that my heart skipped when we first met
Now that I`ve heard it, it leaves me with a kind of regret
No disrespect but we left a lot of people upset
And what we had wasn`t really what we`d come to expect.

so i have a tumblr account now which i'm already falling in love with. i feel like i'm slightly betraying blogger but not really.

http://reginakelsey.tumblr.com/

i am cold, unfeeling and odd.

It'd be easy to sit here and wallow in hell
Or I could suck it up, get over myself
You see, all hearts are broken
It's no big deal, I've been hurt
But I'm sure you all know how that feels
We all go through it
So why do we do it again?
Is it even worth the awkward anger of trying to be friends?

This year will swallow me whole, it's taking its toll
Queen of horses mad with power, heads will roll
So tenderly you bleed me dry
And I, I collapse to the floor

I've been feeling surprisingly lonely these days
I guess substitutes have an aftertaste
And I hate you for making me feel I could easily be replaced

They say that the coffin can't confine the soul
I'm burying secrets you should've told
This is only a goal you want to achieve so you can be alone

So if I agree, I'm not trying to be mean
It's just cold hard facts
Spare me your sugar coats
Well I could've kept you warmer than that.

shit?

so i managed to use SCHADENFREUDE in my English A level exam the other day, my life is complete. on the other hand this now means i only have Geography left; i sat down earlier to revise and ended up crying for 20 minutes over the geopolitical tensions between Russia and the Ukraine over a gas pipeline. I kid you not.

yay:
1. Darwin Deez is playing at Reading
2. ADAM GREEN IS PLAYING AGAIN AT READING... seeing him in 2008 was one of the best moments of my life, ever.
3. Freelance Whales are playing at Reading
4. Yuck are playing at Reading
5. The Cheek (Cheeky Cheeky & The Nosebleeds) are playing at Reading
6. I had some chicken earlier
7. The weather was nice today
8. I have finished both Philosophy & Ethics and English A levels
9. In approximately two weeks I will be free of schooling, forever (except for potential gap yah and retakes but we don't mention this).

nay:
1. I have two Geography A2 exams within the space of two weeks, which are possibly the hardest things i've ever had to do in my life
2. I think i'm putting on weight
3. I've broken out in a delicious combination of stress acne and red dry patches of skin
4. It's Ascot week - the worst week of the year when you live in the area, srsly.
5. I'm craving Cat
6. I'm craving A cat, we haven't got another one yet and i need some pussy lovin' (eh)
7. my hair is neglected

i am frantically flailing, woozy inhaling these fumes that won't put me to sleep.

I like words.

1. flail - to move vigorously or erratically, to thrash about.
2. sporadic - recurring in scattered and irregular or unpredictable instances
3. prelapsarian - relating to the time before the Fall of Adam and Eve
4. antagonism - a state of deep seated ill will.

and my personal favourite

5. SCHADENFREUDE - enjoying the misery of others, taking delight in the misfortune of others.

cause i'm not good at saying things, especially to you

Plans for the summer:
1. Get a job
2. Go and stay in a caravan somewhere lovely with Cat and her lovely jubbly friends
3. Go to at least one Gay Pride (preferably London or Brighton)
4. Go to London Zoo
5. Make approximately five/six bottles of skittles vodka with Sophia (one for every flavour)
6. Write a song with Katy and record a music video a la Julia Nunes 'Maybe I Will'
7. Dye my hair a ridiculous colour
8. Get another piercing
9. Buy more clothes/ shoes (serious, i don't have enough).
10. Sort out stuff/ pack for uni (ahh!)
11. Go to a strip club
12. Go to Camden numerous times
13. Go to Mandela Court with Sophia ;D aha
14. Blow shit up.
15. Go to Reading festival, see a shitload of bands and maintain a state of being fucked for the whole three days.

Well the way you pull the fuzzys from my sweater
doesn't make up for the times you let me sink into the floor
and the lies you told to make me feel all better
they didn't work so please don't tell me anymore

I'm waking up to see the sun
it's a light that lets me know a new day's begun
and I can leave behind the terrors of my unconscious mind
into the sunshine

tell me this, why do you run away
just when I decided to say something true for once
you should try it, just say what you mean
cause I can't read the lines let alone in between

and I know my mellow tone can be misleading
but I've just put my anger to good use
you see I've given up on begging and pleading
every scratch on this guitar is because of you.

32's still a godamn number, 32 still counts.

so despite parking in space number 32 at school and getting 32 pence change at the supermarket AND drinking a red bull which has 32mg of caffeine per 100ml, yesterday was shit.
yeah, revising from 9am to 6pm three days in a row can't be healthy for any human being. so today, despite the fact that my exam is TOMORROW, i'm gonna chill out a bit.

and this deserves a post all of it's own

some people think i'm bonkers, but i just think i'm free

a few more of the frivolities; as much as i complained about it, i godamn loved that school and i think we made a cracking exit :D