I feel so numb, so swept aside

i don't do anything anymore, I just count these ceiling tiles falling through my floor.

All these nights I burnt, hours I turned
You think that by now I'd learnt
That you're only what you pretend to be
I guess that was just lost on me.

the last couple of days have been pretty mint; i'm slowly but surely recovering... my throat is still hoarse and sore & i have a delightful phloegmy cough, but everything else is all gravy.