Last night I dreamt that my friend Ruth tried to have sex with me and then it turned out that she had a willy and I didn't want to have sex with her and she got really upset and then the next morning I was making tuna sandwiches for Triston and Doig except the tuna looked like pink caviar and I was telling them about Ruth having a willy but they didn't believe me.

I also dreamt that our living room was an aquarium and we had loads of fishes and a shark and a huge tortoise, and we still had the cricket feeder (which we have in real life to feed the bearded dragon) except instead of crickets there were massive spiders in there, and we had to feed them couscous to keep them alive but then some of them turned into butterflies and some of them turned into tiny elephants and I was terrified of the massive spiders but the tiny elephants were really cute.