i no longer hear the music when the lights go out.

GRAVY TIMES!
lots of firsts today and yesterday. i:
1) got served at 3 bars
2) tried FRÜLI which is like strawberry flavoured beer and amazing
3) smoked in front of a family member (well only my sister, but still)
4) tried camels and dunhills which were both a bit of alreet
5) went to the london dungeon which was surprisingly creepy-ish
6) found a nose ring that actually fits and looks reppin' ;D
7) slept on an orthopedic mattress
8) bought a super CRAZY hair dye

do you believe in magic?

3As and a B, get in sonny jim?
my pappa only gave me twenty quid and a pat on the back though, what a let down haha.

the sun will rise, even if you don't happen to be there.

i am feeling a) tired b) melancholy c) lonely d) anxious.

i am reading a) The Well Of Loneliness by Radclyffe Hall b) The Zombie Survival Guide by Max Brooks c) The Tempest by William Shakespeare d) L'etranger by Albert Camus.

i am listening to: a) The Start Of Something by Voxtrot b) Dorchester Hotel by The Sounds c) Dull Life by Yeah Yeah Yeahs d) Night Of The Living Dead by Tilly & The Wall.

i want a) a HUGE change b) more people around me c) a more carefree outlook on everything d) a pretty specific kind of girl.


i don't want a) to get my results on Thursday b) my hair to get any wilder c) to feel this low all the time d) things to stay the same.

yeah, he wanted to be a policeman but his head wouldn't fit in the helmets.

HAPPY TIMES!
a) kitty's home
b) my sister came to visit
c) i gave blood and felt very good about it and didn't die
d) kitty's home
e) it's SUPER DUPER nice weather
f) it's reading festival soon
g) i have a MOLDY PEACHES T-SHIRT which i'm never gonna take off ever
h) kitty's home.









i know so many white people
i mean, where do i start?
the trouble with white people
is you can't tell them apart
i'm so bad with names and dates and times
but i'm big on faces
that is, except for mine

i believe you when you tell me
we've met before
this time you've got my interest
this time you've got the floor
why don't you go and tell me something
i don't already know
give me something to remember you by
when i go

i eat too much
i laugh too long
maybe i'll like too much of you
when i'm gone

let's go over to the window
and sit in the neon light
let's go out walking
you know, it's garbage night
let's go down to the east river
and throw something in
something we can't live without
and then let's start again

the more you talk
the more i get
the sense of something
that hasn't happened yet
the more you talk
the more i want to know
the way i'll remember you
when i go

i eat too much
i laugh too long
maybe i'll like too much of you
when i'm gone

i am so many white people
i mean where do i start
i've got lots of personalities
i just can't tell them apart
and i never remember anything
except for those things
which i never forget you know
there's no in between

i'm big on your face
yeah it's big in my mind
you're like the rest of the human race
you're one of a kind

is this the end or just the start of something really, really beautiful (wrapped up and disguised as something really, really ugly)?

maybe you would have been something i'd be good at.

okay, I NEED CAT. I NEED HER. THIS IS URGENT AND SUPER IMPORTANT AND EXPINENTIALLY MORE ARRRRRGH THAN ANYTHING THAT'S EVER HAPPENED EVER.
up till now it's been like 'okay yeah, it'd be nice to have kitty around, i kinda miss her but it's okay cause she's having a nice time in India la la la'.
but now, it's like INDIA YOU FUCKING WANKERS GIVE ME MY KITTY BACK OR I'LL TAKE AWAY ALL YOUR CURRY POWDER. THAT'S RIGHT, ALL OF IT. THEN YOU'LL HAVE NOTHING BUT NORMAL PLAIN RICE AND CHICKEN LIKE EVERYONE ELSE MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA. HA.
i NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED HER. i NEEEEED her. it's not even funny anymore; if i don't have kitty soon i'm going to die a very slow and painful death. VERY SLOW. and VERY PAINFUL. this isn't an over exaggeration, I NEED CATRIONA HELEN ANNA EASDALE. I NEEEEEEEEED HER, BRING HER TO ME GODAMMIT!!!!!
i think i have made my point clear.

nobody knows it, but you've got a secret smile.

i've had a headache all day and i had a jab earlier, unfun times :(

HOWEVER yesterday was a lot more 'citing; i went into Reading with alex kirkham and we met two cool if slightly nerdy people called Ben and Georgia. Ben was gay and kinda hit it off with alex and i like him cause he watched Psychoville; Georgia was straight and i found her very funny because she laughs a lot and she has a thing for old people.









songs right now:

1) First Day Of My Life - Bright Eyes
2) Secret Smile - Semisonic
3) No Rain - Blind Melon
4) Tango - Lady Sovereign ;)
5) Nothing But My Baby - Alphabeat
6) Cheated Hearts - Yeah Yeah Yeahs
7) In The Aeroplane Over The Sea - Neutral Milk Hotel

i think i was blind before i met you...

I am a lesbian and I was walking through a busy town holding my girlfriend's hand. As usual, we were glared at and yelled at a lot. Then we passed a woman walking with her daughter, who was maybe 7 years old. The little girl asked her mom why two girls were holding hands, and we heard her say after we passed, "Because they love each other." GMH.

oh god i can tell i'm on my period... i read this and now i'm actually WEEPING.

this is the first day of my life.

i've been home alone all day so far and i'm getting vaguely nervous/crazy but it's okay; i watched a japanese horror movie this morning and i got so scared i couldn't move, hahaha oh dearrr...












and then i got the WORST stomach cramps in the whole world so i lay on the floor and swore for a bit, that was kinda unfun.
but THEN i found this girl and fell in love:



so that was quite nice :)
and now i'm listening to this Bright Eyes song over and over again, because it's funny and heart warming and upsetting all at the same time which is kinda how i'm feeling.

Yours is the first face that I saw
I think I was blind before I met you
Now I don’t know where I am
I don’t know where I’ve been
But I know where I want to go.

blind melon.

All I can say is that my life is pretty plain
I like watching the puddles gather rain
And all I can do is just pour some tea for two
An speak my point of view
But it's not sane, it's not sane

I just want someone to say to me oh, oh, oh, oh
I'll always be there when you wake yeah,
You know I'd like to keep my cheeks dry today
So stay with me and I'll have it made

And I don't understand why I sleep all day
And I start to complain that there's no rain

And all I can do is read a book to stay awake
And it rips my life away, but it's a great escape

All I can say is that my life is pretty plain
You don't like my point of view
Then I'm insane
Its not sane... Its not sane

and all i can do is pour some tea for two, and speak my point of view (but it's not sane).

:)