me: LOOK AT THIS EARRING MUM (shows smiley face earring)
mum: OH YES, VERY 90s RAVE *does some weird dance and sings* E EEZA GOOD E EEZA GOOD
me: MUM WTF
mum: E IS GOOD?! IT'S A 90S SONG ABOUT ECSTASY.. YOU KNOW, THE DRUG
me: OH.. OH RIGHT
mum: ANYWAY NIGHT SOPHIE... OH AND BY THE WAY, DON'T TAKE DRUGS!

i swear she gets crazier by the day. Also my father (who keeps her vaguely sane) is in France until Sunday; lord help me.

up in my lonely room where i'm dreaming of you, oh what can i do? i still need you girl.

so module results today; i got a C in geography which is basically a bit shit cause i need an A to get into Sussex which is where i majorly want to go. my mother was oh so supportive and helpful as usual.

Me: mum, i'm worried i'm not going to get into university.
Mum: well you see, i don't really know what the appropriate maternal response is here. i could tell you that it's all going to be fine and you'll get the grades, but i don't know if you will so that'd be lying. i could tell you that you can always take a gap year and re-apply and it doesn't really matter, but it does matter so i'd also be lying. so i'm going to be honest - i'm fucking shitting myself for you.
Me: ... ta.
Mum: more wine?

i'm not quite sure people really understand/appreciate my mother at her best, so i've provided some visual aids:














this is my aunt Dibs, my sister, me and my mumma (just LOOK at her xD) when we went to see the Rocky Horror Picture Show and my mum insisted that everyone dressed up for it... nobody else was.














mum back when she was cool ish.. i rly wish she had kept that t-shirt so i could sneakily steal it.


















oh madre.

i recommend biting off more than you can chew to anyone (i certainly do)

everything's quite nice; my hair is behaving, last night was chillaxing.. kitty pierced my ears (2nd lobes) and they burn a bit but they're not manky or nowt.

talked to mumma a lot at lunch about her work and her crazy family and my gayness and it was okay except she cried a bit. i worry about her sometimes, but at the same time i think she'll be alright cause she's A LOT like me and i'm always alright in the end :)

there's so much i want to say, want to tell you just how good it feels when you look at me that way

hahahahahahhhahaaha, SOPHIESAVAGE.







so anyway, er today was nice. watched a creepy play, ate a delicious JUMBO SAUSAGE with laura, bunked off geography and watched The Rocky Horror Picture Show with my very seriously totally and completely straightish mother.

it's your birthday, drink your pee take off your shirt day.. (captain noodle saves the day)

sHAPPY BIRTHDAY CAT, YOU'RE 16 YAY YAY YAY etc etc etc etc.

so today i didn't go to school, instead i:
1) took my driving theory test and PASSED despite the fact i didn't understand what the secretary was telling me to do and had a really loud breathing lady next to me ;)
2) exchanged polite conversation with a group of indians at Staines station.
3) walked at least 4 and a half miles (literally, i worked it out).
4) felt immensely underdressed and tramp-like at Ascot station... twice.
5) had to walk for like a mile with Peter Wheatley and his super sexy friends, including a really chubby boy who kept trying to hug me (it was riveting).

i SWEAR my parents think i've left home. my dad's gone to Switzerland this morning for like 5 days and nobody even bothered telling me.. and my mumma's dancing some African dance at some community centre somewhere tonight; she just phoned.
mumma: hello darling, why are you at home?
me: er, because i live here?
mumma: oh, oh right yes.. well um, i'm out african dancing tonight so er, get yourself some food.
me: but mum, there's nothing in the house except wine and houmus...
mumma: okay sweetie bye!

hahahahaha i love my life sometimes (but really not).




nom?

which one of you bitches wants to dance?!

at school, nobody' s in... starting to get a little paranoid that i'm not actually supposed to be in school today. =/

i guess the computers wouldn't be turned on if we weren't, blaiiii.













'you know, it's like the mafia... sending each other fish in the post'

i'm giong as bernard black to cat's party on friday, fun beansss :)

mumma started crying last night cos people are being mean to her at work and she thinks she's going to lose her job soon; i got upset a) because she was upset and b) because she felt the need to hide it from me.

i'm nearly 18 and i hate the way that my parents still feel the need to put on a front when i'm around. i know they want to protect me, but i can handle it.