me: LOOK AT THIS EARRING MUM (shows smiley face earring)
mum: OH YES, VERY 90s RAVE *does some weird dance and sings* E EEZA GOOD E EEZA GOOD
me: MUM WTF
mum: E IS GOOD?! IT'S A 90S SONG ABOUT ECSTASY.. YOU KNOW, THE DRUG
me: OH.. OH RIGHT
mum: ANYWAY NIGHT SOPHIE... OH AND BY THE WAY, DON'T TAKE DRUGS!

i swear she gets crazier by the day. Also my father (who keeps her vaguely sane) is in France until Sunday; lord help me.